Sweet Remorse
by mindylu32
Summary: Oliver's secret is finally out and Felicity is in need of some space. Written from Oliver's perspective. I'm hoping maybe my muse might cooperate and I can write one from Felicity's.


Oliver opened the door to see Felicity placing something on the table and he heard the light clink of metal on glass and he knew instantly what was happening.

"Felicity?", it came out a mere whisper but yet it was full of longing.

"Oliver I thought I would be gone before you got back."

"Fel...", Oliver stopped mid-way through her name when she held up her hand.

"Oliver I just need some space right now. I need time to think and being here with you I can't do that. It's like you're the sun and I have to orbit around you. I need to be free from that. Just for a little while."

"What do you mean by a little while? Is it completely over or?", Oliver couldn't quite keep the small amount of anger in his voice.

"Oliver right now I want to hold off on the wedding. Right now I'm angry and upset. You didn't trust me enough with..."

"Felicity I explained that..."

"Yes, I know. I just..." Felicity let out a long sigh, "I just want some time please give that to me Oliver. I think you can do that."

Oliver didn't speak but just dipped his head in a slight acknowledgment. He heard Felicity release the breath she obviously was holding waiting on his answer.

Felicity started to walk to past him and Oliver reached out and grabbed her hand. He had no intention of doing so but it had to be instinctual as everything between them was. Oliver choked down a breath and said, "Please don't go".

Felicity tugged at her hand and Oliver gave no resistance as he released it. He felt her silky smooth hand slip past his. He took note of every surface. He smiled internally with satisfaction as he felt her small shiver. He knew it was probably because of the calluses on his hand running along her smooth one. He would take that small victory, for now.

"Goodbye Oliver."

Oliver watched as Felicity closed the door of the loft behind her. He stood there frozen for what felt like forever. He stood perfectly still in the same spot until he could no longer smell her perfume drifting in the air. He thought for sure she would come back through those doors but suddenly the setting sun gave way to night and she didn't return.

Oliver didn't know what to do with his life. What was he supposed to do now without Felicity in his life? She had always kept him grounded. Suddenly he felt adrift in the ocean. Flowing to and fro with the waves.

Oliver trudged up the stairs to the bathroom. He stripped off his clothes and turned on the shower. He watched as the steam began to fill the room before he stepped in. The warm water started falling over his body and then he looked to his right and there it was. It was a tiny pink bottle full of liquid that shimmered in the light. A grenade would have been less dangerous. He reached his hand shakily towards it and lifted the top. He put it up to his nose and took a long deep breath and suddenly she was everywhere. Her scent surrounded him. He let out animalistic howl and dropped to his knees. He could feel the sudden jolt as his bones made contact with the tile but that pain was minimal compared to the pain ripping through his chest. The sobs racked his whole body. What had he done? How had he let this happen? He was so stupid! He was an idiot! He had lied to the one person he knew he never had to lie to.

Oliver stayed under the water until it turned cold. He barely registered his body shivering with the cold. He got out and made his way to the bed. He curled up on her side not caring that he got it soaking wet. A tiny smile crept across his face thinking how Felicity always teased him about leaving his wet towels on her side of the bed.

Oliver laid in the dark of the room he shared with her. He could smell the faint odor of her shampoo against her pillow. He curled himself up around it. In that moment he knew that his life did not work without Felicity Smoak. The darkness had already began to creep in on him without her there.

Oliver made a promise to himself that he would do whatever it took to earn her trust again. To earn her love. He realized that she was wrong she was the sun and he revolved around her and without her light the darkness would eat him alive.

Oliver finally started to drift off into a restless sleep. Through the night the loft was quiet save for Oliver's anguished cries of, "Felicity", coming at regular intervals.


End file.
